Happy, Happy, Happy!

I'm writing simply because I'm happy! I had SUCH a good day for work, and that calls for a happy blog post!

We hired all these new people and the two I've met so far, are just awesome! They're the kind of people that bring out the best in me & that I can be myself around. I love my co-workers!

A lot of people can probably relate to this, but I'm extremely shy when I first meet people. The sole reason is because I'm extremely nervous around people, especially peers. I wonder what they're thinking of me & often times automatically assume they are more confident in themselves and "know who they are" more than I know who I am, and that intimidates me, so I shut down. I can barely mutter out a word at times, or my sentences become all jumbled. This is something I constantly have to remind myself to work on. I have to tell myself, "Just be yourself," and "They probably aren't thinking bad thoughts about you," (truth is, people are so critical, even when we don't mean to be, so I just need to be myself despite what they could be thinking), etc., etc. I tell myself all sorts of things to try to get words out of my mouth and not sound like a complete mute/shyest person on the planet. Here's the cool thing...if I'm feeling confident in myself, I can say pretty much whatever I want, to anyone I want. I almost completely stop caring what other people think. So basically I've just got to bring my confidence up a little! (I'm completely confident around my family & good friends...and alone...haha)

Well, what's been cool about working at Golden Spoon is that I haven't felt that "Oh no, what do I say?" sort of feeling yet, at least not with my co-workers. I've felt pretty darn confident! I've been able to talk and get things done just fine! And tonight I hit my "being myself" peak as well. Whenever I'm at first shy around people or can only talk well, but can't be myself yet, I eventually (well, with most people) hit this "wall," or "bridge" as I like to think of it, where all of assuden I let my guard down. I always know when I've let my guard down with people. It's very distinct in my mind and I often think, "Oh phew, my guard is down now. Things will get much easier. I won't have to put in as much effort to talk and be myself. It'll come naturally."

So anyways, it sounds silly that I'm explaining all this (this process of going from shy to outgoing), but it is the epitome of my life. It hasn't just happened tonight. It has happened with every set of roommates I've ever had, with every best friend I've ever had, with most boyfriends that I've had, etc. The only people that I feel I have always had my guard down with and have always been able to be myself around...since, well...birth, are my family members. This process from going from shy to outgoing, fun, myself happens often (with the right people, the kind of people I feel like I can be myself around.) I wish I had it easier and could automatically be myself like it seems like most people are able to do, but I guess, for now, until I perhaps learn how to be myself right off the bat, this is just the way things are for me!

I am happy today because in one 6 hour shift at work I was able to go from somewhat "quiet, shy, reserved Coral" (but still able to talk Coral) to "fun, kind of crazy, silly, completely myself Coral" and that felt GREAT. I broke down the wall. I crossed the bridge! Whatever you wanna call it. I'm glad about it.

So the night consisted of playing with bubbles, making new name tags for ourselves with toppings bar names (butterscotch, fat free fudge, eggnog) (we used the toppings bar tags as our name tags to see if guests would notice...only one guest did), teasing each other, laughing extremely hard, calling the cops when the homeless man outside started throwing trash at customers and actually STOLE ONE GIRLS FROZEN YOGURT, and of course, serving our customers happily!

I am so grateful for great friends, walls broken down, my jobs, my family, the church that I belong to (Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, Mormon), BYU-Idaho, happy moments when I forget all about my stresses, and for everything else that makes me happy in my life (and even some of the things that don't, but that make me stronger).